You MIGHT be a Redneck if......

Don't you hate it when you get up in the morning and need to hurry on

your way and there is a turkey on your car?

"Hey turkey- get off my dad's car!"

(Actually, his name is Spike and he lives next door.)

"Spike, go home!"

"Ok Spike....It's time I tell you about a little holiday in November."

(Now- I think she has his attention.)

Busy Summer Report......yeah, that's a good excuse!

Is time sprinting? It is half way through July, and then it will be August, and then there are four months until Christmas.....
Please don't tell me you have started shopping. Thanks.

On our walk last night my husband exclaimed for two blocks regarding all of the things he wants/needs to do with the kids before school starts. #3 made his dad a handy "Everything I Want to Do This Summer" list and has been steadily checking them off. Happily pulling weeds and swimming lessons were at the top of #3's priorities- not really.

Just so he will remember that he actually did have fun this summer here are some of our moments so far:

First of all: Serious guy stuff like- knocking holes in walls and helping Dad move the laundry room shower was high on the list. This was necessary so Mom could use the tile she bought at a yard sale and we wouldn't have to listen to her crow about "the best deal ever!!!"

I would post a picture of the completed project, but alas, we ran out of tile and now are waiting some weeks to get our special order. Drat!

After such a blow #3 sought inner peace....until he fell over.

He still has to shower upstairs with the rest of us.

After dealing with our inner-peace-issues, we took a jaunt to Idaho to hang out with our family there and those who had travailed from Arizona. We had a grand romp involving large quantities of sugar and fat- mixed with some less than graceful physical activities.

Bowling was a hit with the kids.
The little darlings apparently got their stance from their mother.

Free hair cuts were part of the travel package at this hotel. Thanks to the family barber. He is starting up a new business if anyone is interested in a trim.

Not really.

..besides- you couldn't afford him, unless you live in Arizona.

One of the memorable/traditional outings we indulged in was the yearly outing of "the boat".

We have had this boat since I was in junior high and it has become a beloved family... icon. Someone could get a new boat, but it just wouldn't be the same family experience without all of the quirky rituals necessary to speed us and the boat on our way. Actually, this year the motor ran like butter, and the entertainment value was depleted when no one had to race to the back of the boat and pump the ball connected between the fuel line and the motor.

Buckaboo entertained the youngest group with sugar and songs, while Papa taught the eldest how to drive a boat. I think they cemented their coolness-status for years to come.

Have you ever been to the area around Mt. Rainier?

Oh, my goodness! You have to take yourself there at some point in your life. It it a testament to the creation. While we were there we had the thrill of seeing our uncle race. It was very educational and the testosterone packed. The boys were amazed- and I am glad they are not anywhere near driving age.

We also did a lot of this:

Nothing says "good family fun" like making brownies with Dad!

When we were dating my favorite sidekick put these on his husband-resume. I was sold! Hot guy with chocolate = a deadly combination!



The best part of our summer was attending the sealing of my amazing sister's oldest son, Little "C", to his parents. We never thought it would be possible, but miracles occur- sometimes when we least expect them. He is now part of a forever family, just like his brothers. Words can't describe our joy!

Why my Chicken will Never be Able to Cross the Road

Picture an odd little brown hen repeatedly flinging herself beak-first at a wire fence around a compost pile. Is it sick that I find that sort of thing totally hilarious?

I should probably have been more sympathetic,but......It was rather reminiscent of Mike Myers "hyper-hypo" from "Saturday Night Live" years ago. ( Not a huge fan of the show, but that bit was truly funny.)

I would have helped the determined chicken, but I didn't want to stifle her growth opportunity. All she had to do was take five or six steps to the left and she would have discovered the entire side of the fence was open. In her enthusiasm to join her sisters as they rooted around in the newly turned compost- she kept ramming spastically at the poor defenseless fence instead of engaging her hen sized intellect.

I know there is something profound in that story, but I will let you sort it out on your own.

For me...I took the road shallowly traveled, and thought, "That chicken reminds me of Shakespeare." Specifically- the ridiculous characters of Rosencrantz and Guildenstern in Hamlet. We should have named those two brown hens in their honor, but that would leave the issue of our dominant-goldish hen. You can't really name a hen Hamlet.

Actually , I think there is a pig somewhere named that.

What do you say to- Rosencrantz, Guildenstern, and.....Omelet?

Young Women, Young Women!

I am pushing 40. Actually, I have been pushing/shoving 40 since I turned 35. I catch myself thinking I am 40 even though it is over a year away. This being oddly stated- some moments in my life make me want to gulp and exclaim, " I did not originate with the dinosaurs!!!" Cause of this little rant:


Scene location and set up: Comfortable old Suburban schlepping almost 13 year old daughter to Beehive activity.

Mom (me) glancing down-" Wow, those Personal Progress books are a lot smaller than the ones they had when I was your age. Very convenient."
Daughter- " Did you get your Young Women's medallion or did they not have those back then- 'cause you can still earn one?"
Mom- " Yes, I earned my award. We could get it when we were a little younger when I was in Young Womens. I think I was 16. You know that ugly pink, brown , and green log cabin quilt in the closet? I made that as part of my project."
Daughter- " Wow. So....did you keep a hive of bees, too?"
Mom- "No, beloved daughter."
Daughter- " How about riding a horse for 30 miles?"
Mom, slightly exaggerated-" I didn't know Brigham Young, either."


Good grief!

Out of the Loop

I have some cherished friends with whom few people seem familiar. On occasion, when their names are mentioned I draw blank looks, and wonder if I am from another dimension....or have dementia.

Maybe, it's because I spent large quantities of time with my grandparents (no dementia) when I was a kid, or a fascination/delight with history, or..... who knows.

So I don't feel alone, and out of curiosity- Do you know or have you been introduced to:

Greer Garson

Walter Pigeon

Myrna Loy

Irene Dunne

William Powell

How about:

Gary Cooper

Rita Hayworth

Clark Gable

Cary Grant

Carol Lombard

Jimmy Stewart

Obviously these are all movie stars. I am not trying to be patronizing. I just want to spread the love AND these people are a delightful answer to today's mucky media options. After hounding my family and dear friends over and over and over and over again- inquiring if they had seen certain films- I thought I would just post a list of some of my favorites and leave the poor people alone. So, thank you for allowing me to indulge. Here goes:

*My latest favorite: "I Remember Mama"- with Irene Dunne. About a turn of the century Norwegian family in San Francisco.

"You Can't Take it With You"- Centers around a quirky family -staring Carol Lombard and a young Jimmy Stewart.

If you like Carol Lombard (wife of Clark Gable and sadly died young in a plane crash) check out "My Man Godfrey" also, with William Powell.

William Powell can also be seen in the "Thin Man" series with Myrna Loy. I think there are five movies in all. They are sort of "Perry Mason" meets a mild Lucille Ball mysteries.

Some of you may be familiar with Greer Garson in a very loose adaptation of "Pride and Prejudice", but have you seen her in "Goodbye Mr. Chips", "Mrs. Miniver" with Walter Pigeon, or "Random Harvest" . Very good movies, a bit more on the emotional side bring a hanky.

We have all seen Clark Gable in "Gone with the Wind", but have you seen him do comedy? Check out "It Happened One Night" where he stars with Claudette Colbert. I think she has the biggest eyes in Hollywood history.

Gary Cooper is one of my favorite leading men. I am a sucker for a soft spoken man. "Sergeant York" is a movie worth watching- about a pacifist who was drafted into WWI- based on a true story.

Others:

"On Moonlight Bay" & "By the Light of the Silvery Moon"- with Doris Day

"The Ghost and Mr Chicken"- with Don Knotts- a very silly family favorite

And- you can never lose with "Singing in the Rain" or "The Unsinkable Molly Brown" if you are into musicals.

I will get off my box now.

*Disclaimer: Children may react adversely to black and white movie media. They may convulse and show signs of Turrets.

Eye, Eye... Captain?

Knowledge of ocular science has never been one of my areas of interest, but due to bad luck in the the eye department our kiddos have thrust us into the realm of eyeball health.

Case in point- #5.

Last summer we noticed that her right eye was determined to do it's own thing, especially if she was tired. It just scooted on in...not a talent we were too thrilled about. Two of our older children have amblyopia (lazy eye), but their eyes don't move....unless they want them to. So, we schlepped #5 to the doctor-an adventure in its self.

We thought some therapy would clear it right up, but nope. When we dilated her good eye, so her weaker eye had an opportunity to get its act together, the left eye turned in. -Not the result we were hoping for. The only thing that corrects such issues is surgery on the eye muscles.

So, we headed for the Big City.

On day one we had a pre-op appointment. We had met the surgeon a couple of weeks before. He was fantastic. They checked angle measurements and gave us the plan for the next day. Due to nerves and a very wiggly two year old we hit Ikea and the mall instead of lounging in the hotel. (Not a good plan for people without a stroller.)

(Notice the concentration)

After seeing this picture the rest of the men in our family NEED to go to the Lego Store...even if it takes a three hour drive.

Even without a stroller we had a pleasant outing and returned to the hotel to fall into bed. We needed to make it to the surgical center in a timely manner....6:30a.m. gulp....I had alarm clock anxiety dreams all night.

We made it on time and # 5 scored a lovely new gown with matching jewlry- embellished with her name.All went really well until the nurse tried to wheel the wagon down the hall away from us. The sight of us getting farther away as she was pulled into the unknown was a little more than #5 could handle, and my name rang out bouncing down the corridor. "M-O-o-O-o-M!"
So, I dressed in medical garb and accompanied my daughter into the surgery. Holding my baby and reassuring her so she wouldn't be scared as they put her to sleep was one of those difficult mommy moments. Then, I hurried back out to the waiting room to join "Big J".... and wait.

Everything went really well.

After about an hour we were able to hold #5 in recovery. Her eyes were puffy and her tears were blood tinged. We just held her until she woke up and managed to keep some applejuice down. Eventually, we were allowed to take her "home". They don't patch eyes after these types of procedures anymore and we received some strange/horrified looks as we carried #5 through the hotel. Apparently, they don't get a lot of puffy, gooey, somewhat bloody toddlers there. I was sure we were going to get a call from some child agency.

After a post-op appointment the next day we headed home. One perk to eye surgery is that to relax the eye and make the muscles work together the patient should watch lots of movies. No problem...It was a quiet ride home. We had a homecoming party awaiting us- balloon and all.

I didn't take any pictures of her eyes at their worst. They were pretty painful to look at. The whites of her eyes were bloody looking with slight bruises around the edges. # 3 pointed out some people might think she had become a vampire. (No, he has not read any vampire books.) My 6 year old nephew had to cover his eyes every time he encountered #5 around the house. She thought she was all powerful and wanted to chase the boys. #5 didn't realize she really was scary looking.....and that she wasn't suppose to be running. Have you ever tried to get a two-year-old to lay low?

I took this picture today, almost a week out. Things has vastly improved. Even with slightly red eyes #5 is a lot cuter than this. Definitely not a photo contest winner, but it gives you the idea. Now, if we can get through the post-trauma princess-phase...yippee!

Over the last few months I have been helping my mom with a family history book she is putting together on one of her maternal lines. It has been a very rewarding and interesting experience. In fact, I have discovered the cure for Harlequin Romances. (Do they still have those?)
Family History!!!

Aren't these two adorable? I love this photo. These people are my great, great grandparents and they are on my list of people I can't wait to meet some day. I love them. The thrill I get when I see their faces is hard to express- since we have never met...

These are pictures of them when they were young:

He wanted to be a train engineer, but she couldn't bear the thought of him being away.

Here is a bit of a letter her mother wrote.

This is the handwriting of my great, great, great grandmother. So amazing! This lady had a very difficult life. She lived in the South and outlived three husbands. Her daughter (above) had to leave their home state and move far away to Utah for the sin of being kind to the Mormons. They never saw each other again.Before I knew her I thought she looked a little cantankerous, but she was just tired. I imagine she was rather attractive when she was young.

I am so thankful for the laundry awaiting me in the basement- next to the electric washing appliances.